Choosing Love Moving from Ego to Essence in Relationships

Description

Are you sabotaging the love that is possible in your relationships? Have you ever wished you could unlock the love that is your true nature and express it fully? Choosing Love offers a spiritual approach to transforming relationships by showing you how to let go of your preconceived ideas and judgments. By moving beyond your ego and conditioning, you can create a richer, more loving life for yourself and those you care about. You have the power to determine how much love you experience in any given moment. Choosing Love provides profound insights and practical advice about how the ego interferes with love and happiness; moving beyond romantic illusions; recognizing, finding, and sustaining a meaningful relationship; overcoming anger, judgments, criticism, and resentment; resolving issues like infidelity, money, commitment, sexual differences; and seeing the Divine in another. This book was formerly titled Loving in the Moment. Contents Introduction Chapter 1: Letting There Be Two Ego and Essence—Love Is Recognizing the Divine Self—From One to Two— The Role of Relationships in Spiritual Evolution—The Personality Is a Costume —The Ego Rejects Differences—Essence Loves Differences—Letting Life Have Its Way—How Ideas and Images Interfere with Relationships—The Self-Image Is Manufactured—Programming and Relationships—Essence in Relationships Chapter 2: Moving Beyond Judgments Projection—Compatibility Between Personalities—Relationships That support Essence’s Goals—How Judgments Interfere with Finding a Relationship— Criteria for a Relationship: The Ego’s vs. Essence’s—How Judgments Interfere with Sustaining Relationships—Judgments That Pretend to Be Helpful—Finding a Meaningful Relationship—Your Judgments Are About You—Love Is More Important Than Conditioning—Noticing Love—Taking Responsibility for Our Judgments—What to Do About Judgments—Honesty Is Not the Best Policy— The Gift of Acceptance Chapter 3: Moving Beyond Anger The Relationship Between Anger and Judgment—What Not to Do with Anger— How Not to Feed Anger—How to Work with Anger—What Drives Anger— Desires in the Context of a Relationship Chapter 4; Moving Beyond Romantic Illusions The Levels of a Relationship—The Role of the Personality in Relationships— Factors in Compatibility—Friendship Within a Romantic Relationship—Love Is a Choice—The Role of Conditioning in Relationships—The Ghosts That Shape Relationships—Getting Our Needs Met in a Relationship—The Expectation of Sexual Fulfillment—Fantasies and the Expectation of Beauty—The Expectation of Being Cared For—The Biggest Illusion of All Chapter 5: Moving Beyond Conditioning What Drives Conditioning—Ignoring and Accommodating Our Partner’s Conditioning—How to Avoid Being Triggered by Your Partner’s Conditioning —The Power of “I’m Sorry”—The Importance of Forgiveness—And Forget It— Using Humor to Break Ego Identification—Expressing Gratitude—“Always” and “Never” Are Never True—Essence’s Touches—A Spiritual Practice to Improve Relationships Chapter 6: Moving Beyond Differences Differences Don’t Have to Be a Problem—Essence’s Solution to Differences— Meeting Differences from Essence—Working with Dysfunctional Conditioning —Making Joint Decisions—Noticing Resentments—Negotiating Chapter 7: A Spiritual Perspective on Common Problems Infidelity—Inability to Commit—Saving Someone—Savers and Spenders— Different Spiritual or Religious Views—Sexual Differences Chapter 8: Experiencing Oneness Through Another Seeing the Divine in Another—Experiencing Essence in Another—Staying in Essence with Your Partner—Essence in Relationship About the Author