Do Hard Things: Why We Get Resilience Wrong and the Surprising Science of Real Toughness

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"In Do Hard Things, Steve Magness beautifully and persuasively reimagines our understanding of toughness. This is a must-read for parents and coaches and anyone else looking to prepare for life's biggest challenges." -- Malcolm Gladwell, author of Outliers and Talking to Strangers and host of the Revisionist History podcast From beloved performance expert, executive coach, and coauthor of Peak Performance Steve Magness comes a radical rethinking of how we perceive toughness and what it means to achieve our high ambitions in the face of hard things. Toughness has long been held as the key to overcoming a challenge and achieving greatness, whether it is on the sports field, at a boardroom, or at the dining room table. Yet, the prevailing model has promoted a mentality based on fear, false bravado, and hiding any sign of weakness. In other words, the old model of toughness has failed us. Steve Magness, a performance scientist who coaches Olympic athletes, rebuilds our broken model of resilience with one grounded in the latest science and psychology. In Do Hard Things, Magness teaches us how we can work with our body – how experiencing discomfort, leaning in, paying attention, and creating space to take thoughtful action can be the true indications of cultivating inner strength. He offers four core pillars to cultivate such resilience:  Pillar 1- Ditch the Façade, Embrace RealityPillar 2- Listen to Your BodyPillar 3- Respond, Instead of React Pillar 4- Transcend Discomfort    Smart and wise all at once, Magness flips the script on what it means to be resilient. Drawing from mindfulness, military case studies, sports psychology, neuroscience, psychology, and philosophy, he provides a roadmap for navigating life’s challenges and achieving high performance that makes us happier, more successful, and, ultimately, better people. Contents Cover Title Page Dedication Introduction: How We Got Toughness Wrong and Where to Go Chapter 1: From Tough Coaches, Tough Parents, and Tough Guys to Finding Real Inner Strength Chapter 2: Sink or Swim: How We Took the Wrong Lesson from the Military The First Pillar of Toughness: Ditch the Facade, Embrace Reality Chapter 3: Accept What You Are Capable Of Chapter 4: True Confidence Is Quiet; Insecurity Is Loud Chapter 5: Know When to Hold ’Em and When to Fold ’Em The Second Pillar of Toughness: Listen to Your Body Chapter 6: Your Emotions Are Messengers, Not Dictators Chapter 7: Own the Voice in Your Head The Third Pillar of Toughness: Respond Instead of React Chapter 8: Keep Your Mind Steady Chapter 9: Turn the Dial So You Don’t Spiral The Fourth Pillar of Toughness: Transcend Discomfort Chapter 10: Build the Foundation to Do Hard Things Chapter 11: Find Meaning in Discomfort Acknowledgments Notes Index About the Author Advance Praise for Do Hard Things Also by Steve Magness Copyright About the Publisher