The sh!t no one tells you about toddlers: a guide to surviving the toddler years

Description

"They're getting bigger. And you're not getting any more sleep. Second in the Sh!t No One Tells You series, in The Sh!t No One Tells You About Toddlers Dawn Dais tells it like it is - again - offering real advice for parents of growing children. Filled with tips, encouragement, and a strong dose of humor, The Sh!t No One Tells You About Toddlers is a survival handbook for parents on the edge. Chapters include: You Are Living With a Terrorist. Do Not Make Any Sudden Movements Your TV Has Been Hijacked. By Things With Very High Pitched Voices You Suck At This. It's Not Just Your Imagination Remember When You Were A Respected Adult? Now You Go To Mommy and Me Classes Playdates Are the Modern Day Arranged Marriage. Same Age? You'll Love Playing Together! Potty Training is the Sh!ts. And It's Everywhere Everything Is Temporary. You Will Survive This This Childhood Will Be Televised. Hello Camera Phones Let's Lean Back, Not In. Who Has the Energy for So Much Ambition? Coming from one empathetic parent to another, The Sh!t No One Tells You About Toddlers will be appreciated by any parent who has asked: "Why didn't anybody warn me that unconditional love would be so much work?""--;"They're getting bigger. And you're not getting any more sleep. Second in the Sh!t No One Tells You series, in The Sh!t No One Tells You About Toddlers Dawn Dais tells it like it is - again - offering real advice for parents of growing children. Filled with tips, encouragement, and a strong dose of humor, The Sh!t No One Tells You About Toddlers is a survival handbook for parents on the edge. Chapters include: You Suck at This. It's not just your imagination. Walking Is Hard. Bruising is considerably less difficult. Remember When You Judged Other Parents? Prepare to eat your words, with a side of karma's a bitch. Restaurants Are Battle Zones. Spoiler Alert: You are not the victor. Kids Get Sick. Then everyone gets sick. This Childhood Will Be Televised. Hello, camera phones. Your TV Has Been Hijacked. By things with very high-pitched voices. Coming from one empathetic parent to another, the tips in this book are real, clever, honest, and designed to make life with a terrible two- or three-year-old a little bit more manageable. Hilarious, helpful, and handy, this book will be appreciated by any parent who has asked: "Why didn't anybody warn me that unconditional love would be so much work?""--