Real Influence: Persuade Without Pushing and Gain Without Giving In

Description

Authentic influence is about more than creating a strong initial connection--it’s about sustaining professional relationships long after an agreement has been reached. Based on their commitment to listening, genuine engagement, and the pursuit of win-win outcomes, authors Mark Goulston and John Ullmen share a new method that business leaders can use to examine priorities, learn about the needs of key players, earn others’ attention, motivate others to hear more, and add value with question and actions. When others sense they are being pushed--their guard goes up. In business interactions, even if the person you are pitching to does comply with your requests, lingering resentment may undermine the relationship forever. So why do most books on influence still portray it as something you do to someone else to get your way? That out-of-date approach invites resistance and cynicism from those who recognize the techniques. Manipulative tactics fail to produce the mutual trust that sustains successful relationships. They simply won't work in our sophisticated, post-selling world. Complete with examples of the steps in action and insights from real-world “power influencers,” Real Influence is a one-of-a-kind guide that showcases how being straight with everyone means winning for all. www.getrealinfluence.com Introduction The Problem: Why Are You Struggling to Influence People? 5 1 The Dangers of “Disconnect” 7 2 Four Traps That “Disconnect” You 18 STEP #1 Go for Great Outcomes 41 4 The First “R”: Go for a Great Result 43 5 The Second “R”: Go for a Great Reputation 52 6 The Third “R”: Go for Great Relationships 66 STEP #2 Listen Past Your Blind Spot 81 7 To Discover Their There, Listen to the Music 83 8 Master Level-Four Listening 91 STEP #3 Engage Them in Their There 119 10 Use the Three Gets of Engage 121 11 Push Their Buttons— Positively 135 12 Engage Across Cultures 144 STEP #4 When You’ve Done Enough . . . Do More 155 13 Do More Before, During, and After 157 14 Do More in All Three Value Channels 171 15 Ask Other People To Do More 183 Taking Real Influence to the Next Level 191 16 Let Adversity Lead You to Great Outcomes 193 SECTION 7 Putting It All Together 227 20 Case Study #1— A Fuzzy Rescue 229 21 Case Study #2— Everything Matters 234 22 Case Study #3— Poised for Life 237 23 Case Study #4— Taming a Temperamental Group 241 Epilogue 245 Acknowledgments 247 Index 251